Chapter 10 - Guiche

Post Training Notice: National First-Class Registered Exorcist

I fell in Love

Translator(s): juurensha
TLC(s): moon
Editor(s): Jane, jelly

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"You didn't tell me not to come out." Chi Xiaoduo said, "You didn't say that."


Xiang Cheng: “....”


Chi Xiaoduo started laughing, and Xiang Cheng dragged him by the hand to the Land Rover. Chi Xiaoduo wanted to climb up after him , but Xiang Cheng pushed him to stand outside, turned on the light in the car, and bent over to rummage through his duffel bag. Chi Xiaoduo looked on curiously as Xiang Cheng rummaged through his bag again and again. It seemed as though he had forgotten something, and his brow furrowed.


"What's the matter?" Chi Xiaoduo asked.


Xiang Cheng asked, "Have you seen a snuff bottle?"


Chi Xiaoduo shook his head and said, "I haven't touched your bag ah."


Xiang Cheng's expression was irritated, and he looked at Chi Xiaoduo, completely helpless. 


Chi Xiaoduo gave Xiang Cheng an inquisitive glance, and Xiang Cheng said, "Go back to the room. No matter what happens, you’re not allowed to come out. Can you do that?"


Chi Xiaoduo said, "Okay, is this yours?" He took out the statuette and parchment from his pocket.


Xiang Cheng glanced at Chi Xiaoduo and gave up the plan to let him go back to his room.


"Get in the car." Xiang Cheng said.


"What-what-what-what are we going to do?" Chi Xiaoduo was terribly nervous. 


Xiang Cheng replied, "Fasten your seat belt."


Xiang Cheng backed up and left the parking space. The moon was hidden behind the clouds, so after passing the front door of the inn, it was completely dark. Chi Xiaoduo was both scared and excited. Was Xiang Cheng taking him out to do a mission? What did they mean by ‘your didi has been marked by a yao’?


"Why are you taking me out?" Chi Xiaoduo asked.


"Because you won't listen to me and just stay in the room." Xiang Cheng replied, "I can't hypnotize anyone either, and I didn’t bring some key items that would make you fall asleep."


"I’ll listen to you," Chi Xiaoduo said. "If you're in some kind of dilemma, I'll go back and wait for you, okay. It’s just that I'm worried about you, I heard so much just now under the tree. I promise I won't eavesdrop any more, turn around and send me back ba."


"Forget it," Xiang Cheng said. "I'm afraid something will happen to you...it’s still safer for you to come with me."


Chi Xiaoduo kept feeling as though Xiang Cheng was going off to do something important. 


"Baidu something for me." Xiang Cheng suddenly thought of something and asked, "Can your cellphone go online? Search for ‘guiche.’"


Chi Xiaoduo said, "Guiche, a kind of nine headed monster bird, can eat souls, will kill people, and will bleed on roofs. It used to have ten heads, but one was bitten off by a dog, so it often bleeds. Wherever the guiche goes, there will be natural and man-made disasters, but it is afraid of light, and it will get dizzy when light shines on it."


Xiang Cheng thought about it and said, "Wait here."


Xiang Cheng got out of the car and went back to the inn. A moment later, there was a commotion from inside the inn, and the little sister who was the night guard called out, "Who’s there?"


Xiang Cheng ran towards the Land Rover with an emergency light that he had removed from the wall, and he tossed it to Chi Xiaoduo. The night guard chased him outside, but Xiang Cheng quickly got in the car and drove along the mountain road.


Chi Xiaoduo held the emergency light, and the corner of his mouth twitched. 


"Have you seen anyone lately?" Xiang Cheng let out a breath and said, "For example, some unusual people."


Chi Xiaoduo: “???”


Chi Xiaoduo asked, "I've been marked by a yao, what does that mean?"


"Literally that." Xiang Cheng said, "Do you think there are yaoguai around you?"


Chi Xiaoduo was puzzled. He thought about it, and said, "Yaoguai? Does the finance guy in our design department count? "


Xiang Cheng asked while driving, "What’s he like?"


Chi Xiaoduo replied, "He constantly has his fingers up in orchid fingers and wears florals..."


Xiang Cheng: “....”


Chi Xiaoduo said with a laugh, "And he often shakes his hips around, singing Lady Gaga in his deep voice.”


Xiang Cheng:  "I don’t mean that... Lady Ga-what? What’s that? Are you cold? "


Chi Xiaoduo was shrunk in on himself  in the front passenger seat, and he turned his head to look at Xiang Cheng from the side. When the car left the inn’s road, street lights started to appear, and Xiang Cheng drove the car attentively. Chi Xiaoduo looked at his profile and thought he’s really so hot ah. Then he thought about why he was still ready to jump his bones right now, Chi Xiaoduo, there’s no saving you.


"A little bit." Chi Xiaoduo had started sweating when he had eavesdropped just now, so now he was cold.


Xiang Cheng held the steering wheel in one hand, took off his sports coat with the other, and covered Chi Xiaoduo up with it. Xiang Cheng's jacket smelled very comforting, and Chi Xiaoduo hugged his jacket while Xiang Cheng said, "Put it on."


Chi Xiaoduo felt  much warmer, and Xiang Cheng said, "In a bit, follow me. Don't talk, don't say anything."


Chi Xiaoduo let out an “en,” but he was actually a bit sleepy. He thought that Xiang Cheng might  be taking him to a very dangerous place, but he trusted him.


"You just believe in me that much?" Xiang Cheng said, "Getting in the car without even yelling or kicking up a fuss. What if I wanted to hurt you?"


"You won’t." Chi Xiaoduo leaned against the window, looked at Xiang Cheng, and said, "Subconscious instinct."


"What?" Xiang Cheng glanced at Chi Xiaoduo.


He didn’t know why, but a hazy scene emerged in Chi Xiaoduo's mind. It seemed like Xiang Cheng had saved him in a dream, and it also seemed like intuition from the bottom of his heart.


"I think something... must have happened to us," Chi Xiaoduo said strangely. "But I can't remember."


Xiang Cheng didn't speak, Chi Xiaoduo said, "Whatever happened makes  me think that you are very reliable, but I really can't remember it."


Xiang Cheng stopped far away from the fence and said, "Get out of the car."


Chi Xiaoduo got out of the car, and Xiang Cheng said, "Take my bag and from here on out, stay close to me. No matter what happens, don't take even a single step away from me."


"Alright." Chi Xiaoduo rubbed his eyes and, while wearing Xiang Cheng's sports coat, slung his sports bag across his shoulder and followed him.


During the Qin and Han Dynasties, Lianhua Mountain had been a huge natural quarry, covering an area of twenty-five thousand mu. When Lingnan was still South Vietnam, Zhao Tuo had excavated the mountain to collect stones. After two thousand years of water erosion, many man-made or natural quarries had been left behind from the summit to the foot of the mountain.


When night fell, everything changed. Their surroundings became craggy and terrifying, as if ferocious giants were all around them . However, the lights on the opposite side of the Pearl River estuary were blinking, and the night sky was diffuse with dark red light, so it wasn’t too terrifying. Chi Xiaoduo looked around everywhere, and Xiang Cheng crouched down, letting him step on his back and climb up, saying, "Don't take off your shoes."


Xiang Cheng looked big when he took off his clothes and looked thin when he wore them; his muscles all over his body held explosive power. As soon as Chi Xiaoduo stepped onto him, Xiang Cheng put both his hands up to support him, then helped him lift his feet up. Chi Xiaoduo easily flipped over the wall, and Xiang Cheng flew over in the blink of an eye, picking him up and starting to run like mad.


Chi Xiaoduo was confused and disoriented, and two of them landed on a rough stone. Not far away was a cave.


Xiang Cheng looked through his bag and took out some colorful little things from it. Chi Xiaoduo curiously asked, "What is that?"


Xiang Cheng: "Stay here and don't move."


Chi Xiaoduo hurried to return them to Xiang Cheng. Xiang Cheng asked Chi Xiaoduo to sit in the middle of the stone and arranged the colored stone guardians in a circle.


"Sit and play with your cellphone." Xiang Cheng took over his bag and said, "No matter what happens, you can’t shout."


"Okay, okay." Chi Xiaoduo replied.


Xiang Cheng was about to leave, but after thinking about it, he was still a little worried. He came back, glanced at Chi Xiaoduo’s cellphone, and asked, "Do you like listening to music?"


Chi Xiaoduo: “En.”


Xiang Cheng scrolled through his cellphone, and it was almost all English songs. He casually chose a Chinese song, turned it to the maximum volume, and helped him put on his earphones. Chi Xiaoduo sat in the ring of stone guardians and looked out curiously. The song he had picked was ‘Angel Comes to Europe.’


Ping An’s voice rang in Chi Xiaoduo's ears in the midst of this romantic night, just like the sounds of nature.


From the quarry came the faint sound of a bird’s call. Xiang Cheng turned around, took out the Demon Subduing Staff and Yao Binding Rope from the bag, bit down on a stack of red paper, then put his bag down.


Then he signaled to Chi Xiaoduo to hold the emergency light and face it in a certain direction, before then he quickly ran into the quarry in that direction.


Chi Xiaoduo: “???”


He hadn’t brought a gun, so exactly what was he up to? Chi Xiaoduo frowned deeply and stared at the direction that Xiang Cheng had left in. Suddenly, a sharp scream pierced through his earphones; Chi Xiaoduo thought that there was something wrong with the music, so he looked down at his cellphone and slid the volume up and down.


Ping An emotionally sang:

“I want a girl who wanna say love you——”


A nine headed bird sprang onto Xiang Cheng and tumbled down from a high place. Xiang Cheng flipped back and retreated, shouted angrily, and pushed the yao subduing staff forward with one hand. The Demon Subduing Staff turned into a silver plate and blocked the blood mist that the nine-headed bird spat out. It rushed in, and Xiang Cheng then rushed forward, pushing the monster bird back into the quarry again.


Chi Xiaoduo: “?”


Chi Xiaoduo finished adjusting the volume and raised his head. It felt as though something had happened, and there was a strange sound in the distance. He keenly picked up his cellphone and started filming a video while pointing it in the direction that Xiang Cheng had left. 


“I could never stop——”


They say that the speed of events couldn’t keep up with the speed of narration, and Xiang Cheng shot out like a cannonball.


Chi Xiaoduo: “....”


Chi Xiaoduo was about to take off his earphones when Xiang Cheng limped and ran over to Chi Xiaoduo. Chi Xiaoduo rushed out, but Xiang Cheng roared, "Don't move! Stay where you are!”


Chi Xiaoduo didn’t hear him, helped Xiang Cheng up, and the two of them entered the protective circle of the stone amulets. Chi Xiaoduo took off his earphones, but Xiang Cheng held his head and crouched down to shield Chi Xiaoduo with his body. In an instant, Chi Xiaoduo looked up and saw a scene that completely overturned his outlook of the world——


——A huge monster bird with black fire all over its body rushed out of the quarry. Xiang Cheng's shining silver metal stick stuck out of its chest as it hurtled towards Chi Xiaoduo and Xiang Cheng. The nine heads roared together, spitting out nine black plumes of fire that crisscrossed, converging into a powerful torrent, shooting right at them!


Chi Xiaoduo’s mouth dropped open, and he stared blankly at the sky. However, the next moment, the seven stone guardians around him let out an earthshaking roar at the same time. They turned into mythical beasts, and one by one, they leapt towards the sky!


The first stone guardian counteracted the black flame. The second and third ones were blown to pieces. Then the fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh ones, the four transparent, luminous beasts pounced on the monster bird, grabbing and biting at it randomly. The monster bird fell down, bleeding all over. 


Chi Xiaoduo: “......................”


Chi Xiaoduo strongly wondered whether or not he was still dreaming. His eyes were wide open, and his pupils were slack. Looking at the sky, Xiang Cheng turned over his bag with one hand. His other arm quickly blocked Chi Xiaoduo's eyes and face, and he shouted in his ear, "Don't be afraid!"


Chi Xiaoduo was already completely stunned.Ping An’s voice was still singing in the earphones.


I fell in Love——I fell in Love——”


That monster bird rammed into them, and Xiang Cheng suddenly bent over and flew out with Chi Xiaoduo’s cellphone. 


The monster bird rolled around painfully on the ground. The stone guardians only existed for a few seconds, and the monster bird hissed and struggled. Xiang Cheng took out a folded red cloth from his bag and rushed forward.


"My cellphone!" Chi Xiaoduo cried.


Xiang Cheng picked up the cellphone that had fallen onto the ground and with a wave of his hand, threw it at  him. 


Chi Xiaoduo knelt on the ground, trembling as he clicked to take pictures. He raised his head, opened his mouth, stared at a daze at the scene in front of him, and finally reacted to it. What was...this? Damnit! What was this!


Xiang Cheng shook out the red cloth, and just like in a bullfight, the red cloth flew in the wind. However, the guiche bird refused to give up. Its several heads squinted and shook as it faced the light from the emergency light, and the four heads that were not facing the light started to howl at the sky.


"Bind!" Xiang Cheng roared, then shook out the red cloth, and it wrapped around the giant bird. 


At the last moment, the nine headed bird flapped one of its wings, stepped back, took off, and began to spin. This spinning produced a hurricane of wind; Xiang Cheng’s yao binding failed, and he was blown out ass over tea-kettle, dangling on a branch. The nine headed bird suddenly spread  its wings and rushed at Xiang Cheng.


With a crash, both the monster bird and Xiang Cheng slammed through the tops of the trees and fell down. Xiang Cheng's vest was clawed and tattered, and his chest was full of red marks. Then several beaks pecked at Xiang Cheng's eyes at the same time.


"AHHHHHHH——" Chi Xiaoduo roared and rushed over with the emergency light in his arms, waving it wildly at the monster bird.


The monster bird immediately let out a cry, and the harsh scream made Chi Xiaoduo feel dizzy. Xiang Cheng held him in front of him as he cleared off from the ground backwards into the air. He protected Chi Xiaoduo with his shoulders, and shook the corner of the red cloth with the other hand, trying to bind it again.


However, Chi Xiaoduo started yelling. His left ankle was caught tightly by the monster bird, and started lifting him up!


"Damnit——" Chi Xiaoduo cried.


"Careful..." Xiang Cheng held Chi Xiaoduo's waist and didn't let go. The monster bird let out a ferocious cry and carried the two of them higher and higher.


Chi Xiaoduo: “....”


Chi Xiaoduo was upside down, and everything around him was spinning. The monster bird carried Chi Xiaoduo, and Chi Xiaoduo carried Xiang Cheng. The two of them hung upside down as they flew into the sky. The earth spun non-stop and also grew further and further away. Xiang Cheng tried to wave the red cloth upward, but he couldn't get it up there.


Chi Xiaoduo: “......”


The monster bird flew high into the air, and Chi Xiaoduo's eyes were now filled with stars.


"What do we do!" Chi Xiaoduo screamed, "What the hell is this! I was wrong! I shouldn't have followed you out! "


Xiang Cheng grit his teeth and trapped Chi Xiaoduo's waist between his feet. He flipped up by crunching his abs and did his best to observe the surrounding terrain.


"What is it doing?!" Chi Xiaoduo was dragged around by the monster bird flying here and there, and his wide streams of tears were flying in the spring breeze.


"It's going to...smash us into...meat patties..." Xiang Cheng gritted his teeth.


"Alright ba." Chi Xiaoduo began to let out his last words. "Goodbye Boss, goodbye Mom and Dad, goodbye Wang Ren, goodbye bestie, goodbye finances..."


Xiang Cheng: “......”


"It can't fly that high!" Xiang Cheng roared, "I’ll count off ‘one, two, three,’ and you push me up! I’ll bind it, you hold onto me, and we’ll fall into the water! We won’t die from that!”


They were both hanging upside down, and Chi Xiaoduo screamed, "I can't swim! And it heard you! It’s flying up the mountain now!”


Xiang Cheng: “.....”


Chi Xiaoduo looked down, and they were over ten meters away from the ground. The monster bird was obviously trying its best to lift them up high and then throw them down. This height was obviously not enough, and because they wouldn’t die from falling into the water, it left the Pearl River and flew towards the mountains.


“Next time...I definitely have to bring the umbrella," Xiang Cheng shouted. "Do you have a flashlight app?! Shine it on its left!”


Chi Xiaoduo hurriedly turned on the flashlight app on his cellphone and shone it against the left side of the monster bird. When it shone in its eyes, the monster bird screamed, tilted, and almost dumped the two people off.


"Good!" Xiang Cheng said, “Again!”


Chi Xiaoduo shone it again, and the monster bird lost its balance and started plummeting towards its left. 


"Jump!" Xiang Cheng shouted.


Then, biting the red cloth, he vigorously flipped over, grabbed the golden hook hanging there, and pulled out the Demon Subduing Staff from the monster bird’s chest. The nine headed bird spewed out a mouthful of blood and it shook them off, a trail of blood hovering in the air behind. 


Chi Xiaoduo spun and spun, flying towards the Wanghai Guanyin statue in the middle of Lianhua Mountain.


"Hold on tight, don't let go! Soldiers fighting the battle..." Xiang Cheng said, then landed on the Guanyin statue’s shoulder. Chi Xiaoduo’s entire body arced through the air, his body thrown out, his hands tightly holding onto Xiang Cheng’s waist. His hands were stopped by Xiang Chen’s belt, his feet slipped, and he frantically tried to hold himself steady on whatever he could step on. 


Xiang Cheng took the opportunity to shake the red cloth outward.


"March forward in formation——! All yao disperse! Bind!” 


There was a huala sound, and the red sheets instantly turned into billowing red clouds, spreading out to blot out the sky. In the dark night, it shone with a golden light. Between the motionless boundary between heaven and earth, the image of Acala appeared from the abyss. 


A profound hush fell, and the sky sang!


To Chi Xiaoduo’s consternation, the sheet was getting bigger and bigger, catching up with the nine-headed bird, head on wrapping the yaoguai up. Xiang Cheng pulled it back, and the yaoguai wrapped in red cloth, now an irregularly shaped lump in the cloth, rolled around crazily.


Suddenly, the yaoguai disappeared, turning into a five colored yaoguai embroidered on the red cloth. There was a flash of light, then it dimmed, and the world calmed down again. 


Chi Xiaoduo: “.....”


Xiang Cheng: “.....”


Chi Xiaoduo hugged Xiang Cheng’s waist, raised his head, and stared at him. Xiang Cheng let out a breath, and the two people looked at each other for three seconds. The first thing that Chi Xiaoduo did was to slightly lift up the hands that were around Xiang Cheng’s waist and then palapala lightly smacked him a few times. 


"It’s alright ba,"  Xiang Cheng said.


"So hot." Chi Xiaoduo had no way to think of much at all now, so this was his only comment on what had happened tonight. 


"Thank you." Xiang Cheng said sincerely.


"But how do we get down?" Chi Xiaoduo looked down.


The two people looked down together; the Wanghai Guanyin statue was over forty meters tall, and the two of them stood on the Guanyin statue’s shoulder as the sun rose gradually in the distance.

Translator's Comment:

Juurensha: Hahahaha, no matter what, CXD always thinks that XC is so hot!

This chapter is migrated and/or formatted by our fellow chicken enthusiast(s), juurensha.



Fic writer, editor, and translator for GHOFD, PUBG, Fanservice Paradox, and other projects.


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yolk heathen


Where is food?

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4 months ago

XDD Whatever happens, of course Xiao Lao Chi has got his priorities straight (not really). This chapter was like sniffing up steroids at 3 am lmao it’s so chaotic i love it.

Thanks for the chapter!